She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize