Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
