For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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