You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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