But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
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