What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
