I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize