then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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