entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
