i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
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