Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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