I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
only if we run a train.
done.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize