would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
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