its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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