i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
