But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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