I don't remember. Are we still dating?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I have already put on my inside pants.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
