I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Randomize
