Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
