You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize