So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
