he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
