You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
