dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
