The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Sacagawea was the original milf.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
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