I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
