Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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