Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
