it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
