one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
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