absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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