Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
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