Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(650): View more from California

How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?

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(616): View more from Michigan

There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.

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(480): View more from Arizona

... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?

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(773): View more from Illinois

I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.

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(813): View more from Florida

Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.

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(518): View more from New York

I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage

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(407): View more from Florida

There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed

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(206): View more from Washington

I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week

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