Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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