the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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