he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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