He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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