I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Randomize