I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize