I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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