So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Acid is not a monday night drug
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Randomize
