I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
