Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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