mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
