please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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