dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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