is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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