Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize