in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I wish there were birth control emojis
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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