So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
